Tuesday, December 8, 2015

A Letter to Dakota Lee

 photo 10401915_1558271204399881_8476210256401852853_n_zpsslppgq8b.png
{Graphic Made for me by Kissed By An Angel}

Dear Dakota, 

     It's been 14 years since I learned that you existed, only to have you gone at the same time. There isn't a day that I don't think about you, wonder about the what ifs, wonder how you would fit in with the rest. I wonder how your personality would be, how you would look.

     You have always been on my heart and mind, even at the times it seemed like you weren't. Sometimes my life did get a little hectic, and while I remembered you, I didn't always sit down and reflect on the feelings.

     I didn't take your loss lightly. I remember how devastated I was. I remember how sad I was. I remember feeling like I was a failure and that I had let you down.

     I named you Dakota because I really liked the name. I had no idea what it meant or anything. I finally looked it up today. It's a Sioux word for friend. But, it is also believed to mean "forever smiling." I believe that you are forever smiling on me. So, the name is fitting for you.

     Instead of writing my feelings, for the fourteenth time, I wrote a poem instead.

Dakota, Forever Smiling

Never given the chance to live
But all my love to you I give.
A tiny glimmer of hope,
Gone too soon from my womb.
Now I’m left to think of you daily,
With just my memories of my dreams.
Now, you’re forever smiling
While you play in God’s Garden.
A beautiful creature now shining
Down on me, my spirit to hearten.
My precious Dakota, my unborn child,
Thoughts of you bring me a small smile.
I love you to the stars and moon,

My Dakota, gone too soon. 

Love, 
Mommy


** Poem is the property of Crystal of The Italian Bella Diaries aka CJ Delessio **

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