Friday, November 6, 2015

Project Tell Their Story, Week 4

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Ashley at My Angel Lives came up with this awesome challenge to talk about our angels this month. The month of October is Pregnancy and Infant Awareness Month. Her challenge is set up to have one prompt per day for the month. However, I am going to do mine a little different. I will post a week's worth at a time. This post will contain Days 19 - 25 of the challenge.


Day 19: What I Loved Most About my Angel was...

     I'm not really sure how to answer this one. I never got to meet my angels. I guess what I loved most was that they were mine. They were my babies, a part of me. They are a part of me I can never get back yet will always be with me.

Day 20: My Angel Has Inspired me To...

     First, my angels inspired me back in 2001/2002 to help in the goal to have October 15th recognized. My angels inspired me to study psychology; to study how to help others deal with their grief. Third, my angels inspired me to take a greater interest in making sure October 15th is recognized nationally. And finally, my angels have inspired me to take into serious consideration beginning some sort of foundation to help grieving parents.

Day 21: My Time With my Angel Was...

     Very brief. I never even knew about my angels until it was too late. I never saw them on ultrasound. I never heard their heartbeats. I wish I had a story to tell. I wish I had felt them move. Or seen even the smallest blob on a screen. Or heard a heartbeat. But, I don't have any of that. And this is the part that hurts the most.

Day 22: Telling my Angel's Story Makes me Feel...

    First, it makes me feel bittersweet. I am happy that I am at a place where I can talk about them; yet, I am sad that I have to talk about them. 

     I also feel cautious. Some people don't think they should be talked about. This also makes me sad because they deserve to be remembered as well. 

     I get scared when I talk about them because I never know who I am going to offend with my story. Or if anyone really cares about my story. I have kept it all in my inner circle for so long that I get scared to bring it up to others. 

     But, most of all I get sad and weepy. These sweet angels were a part of me. Even though I only had them inside the womb for 6 weeks or 12 weeks, they were mine. I shouldn't have to live my life without any of my children. 

Day 23: I Wonder if my Angel...

     I wonder if my angels would be like my other children. I often wonder if Ashleigh would be like her living twin. I wonder if I would still have the children I have now if I had carried my angels to term. Would I still be a mom of 7 living children or would I be the mom of 10 living children?

Day 24: My Angel Message From Heaven Is...

    If my angels could speak to me from Heaven, they would tell me several things. First, they would tell me that they love me. They would tell me to continue being strong and to live each day to the fullest. They would tell me to treasure their living siblings. They would tell me to continue to be a support system for other angel moms.

Day 25: In Honor of my Angel's Life, I Currently...

     When I still lived in Virginia, I had a special place for all of my symbols for them. However, all of that stuff is still packed up in storage in Virginia. I continue to be a source of support for other mothers. I have decided to plan some PAIL (Pregnancy and Infant Loss) events to raise awareness (this is in developmental stages and I will be putting it into action in early 2016).

** Part 5, Days 26 - 31, will be up on 10/31

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